Walking into therapy used to be something I looked forward to each day. Lately, it seems like I am not getting much out of it because I've been coming for a while now, and that stuff is beginning to be repetitive… Sitting in a small room and working on paperwork is enough to drive me insane… Sometimes, I really hate how different I am… When I am forced to spend several hours on one task with the expectation that I won't get distracted, it frustrates me… Anyway, I really wish the person who was making the decision for my disability…
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Yesterday was rough, emotionally. I think the primary issue was that I held expectations going into this weekend. Expectations breed disappointment. I’m probably about 30-35% of the way done with my friend’s website, excluding images in which she is taking updated photos. I was hoping to have the website about 80% complete by now. My goal was to have it ready to go live before Thanksgiving. The reason for that is so she can hopefully get some more sales for Christmas. There are a few roadblocks that I was not expecting though. I should know by now that hurdles come…
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This weekend was a complete wash. I didn’t get anything done. What a joke. I should have just slept more.
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I refrained from blogging yesterday to allocate time for a one-on-one session with my therapist, delving into significant aspects of childhood trauma. It's an arduous process, but imperative for personal growth. Simultaneously, my day off facilitated substantial progress on a friend's website, contributing to my evolving portfolio. Additionally, the escalating costs of various necessities present a considerable challenge in contemporary times. The intricate nature of adult responsibilities remains an ongoing struggle.
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Yesterday ended on a very heavy topic. Shame. We watched this very brief video and then began discussing the difference between shame and guilt. Then we went into the book… The part that resonated with me was about secret shame. Here’s a photo of the section in the book. Read the whole paragraph. I had to read it 5+ times before it really sank in. I think all of this relates to me, but I’m not sure. I want to process it. There’s a lot to unpack though, as is usual with therapy. But, I think it’s why I blocked…
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In this blog, I reflect on my journey through recovery, navigating life changes and housing struggles. Amidst newfound stability, I encountered unexpected temptations, leading to a brief stint in the world of Party and Play. Little did I realize, this marked the beginning of a complex romantic entanglement with intriguing twists and hidden red flags.
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Today's focus was on emotion regulation and its pivotal role, especially for individuals managing BPD. We explored the nuances of emotional intelligence, internal and external triggers, and delved into the ABC PLEASE model. A striking revelation was the simultaneous experience of contrasting emotions and the importance of acknowledging the complexity inherent in our emotional landscape.
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Embarking on the transformative journey of recovery, I initially relied on "2 Takeaways" for daily reflections. The shift to SMART goals, with their specificity and measurability, marked a pivotal evolution. Challenging myself with diverse objectives, I broke free from routine, discovering untapped resilience. This journey celebrates the beautiful complexities of healing through intentional, varied goals.
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In this blog post, we explore the transformative power of mindfulness and the importance of achieving a "Wise Mind." Discover how to observe, describe, and participate in your life, while embracing the concept of loving detachment. Join us on this journey to enhance self-awareness and well-being.
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One of the areas that I’m working on with my therapist is emotional regulation. Emotional regulation refers to the ability to manage and control one’s emotions healthily and constructively. It involves the capacity to understand, express, and modulate one’s feelings, so they are appropriate to the situation and do not lead to impulsive or disruptive behaviors. Effective emotional regulation is crucial for maintaining stable relationships, making sound decisions, and coping with life’s challenges. Emotional regulation can be challenged by various factors, including biological predispositions. Some individuals may have a genetic or neurological predisposition that makes it more difficult for them…